fullbodied: (Default)
ann "let me eat cake" takamaki ([personal profile] fullbodied) wrote2019-04-02 04:02 pm
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
I don't feel things the way you do. What happened in that... illusion... was the SCP's power affecting our minds. Artificial emotions.

[Doubly artificial, since artificial minds were experiencing them. None of them are real. They're fiction.

He's dissociating again. He doesn't even blink as he shoves it down, forces himself back into the here and now.]


My only concern is keeping all of you safe. I won't fail again.
cryosurgeon: ([endoscope] within hidden depths)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 02:40 am (UTC)(link)
We can't make that judgement until we know the full nature of the SCP. Part of our duty is to maintain professional distance from our experiences, to more effectively evaluate them. Even if those emotions were genuine, they weren't ours, so we have to find out their origin.

[He remembers the tears on his face, too much like the ones he shed in that cell in Resurgam, the ones pulled from him by Holden's blunt words and his own shame. Something feels unpleasantly tight in his chest, another thing to compartmentalize and leave for a much later time.]
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 03:09 am (UTC)(link)
... I'm not a counselor, but I can listen if you want.

[Even if he can't offer advice on emotional issues, some people just need a sounding board.]
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
Revenge isn't a healthy thing, Takamaki. It leaves lasting effects. Even I understand that much.
cryosurgeon: ([endoscope] within hidden depths)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
But you're here, working for the Foundation even though it's dangerous. It means you want to help others. Not every teenager is that selfless.
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-03 06:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[He has to. Right now, the Foundation is his entire life. He literally has nowhere else to go except a frigid cell.

Or would they terminate him, since he isn't actually real?]


... regardless of how they acquired me, I gladly accepted their offer. They barely had to ask.
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-04 03:12 am (UTC)(link)
It was an opportunity to be useful.
cryosurgeon: ([drain] nothing left to give)

[personal profile] cryosurgeon 2019-04-08 05:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I... don’t think it’s wrong, though. We’re trying to protect people from dangers they can’t understand.

[When someone strangles their gut feelings to the point where they ignore them automatically, maybe they buy into other people’s rhetoric with blind faith....]